Friday, August 27, 2010

This road looks familiar, and I want to get off


Anxiety sucks.

I hate this mess with such a passion that I cannot even see straight.

Makenna has been struggling. A lot.

Over the summer she has had some moments, but they were controllable. Now she is constantly having issues every single night, and she has cried and been very stressed for 2 days at school.

It has once again moved on from little worries to irrational fears. She does not want to go to anyone's house, does not want to go to school, does not want to eat, and has completely changed before my eyes

Where is my confident, care-free girl?

Where is the girl that was a leader in her class?

Where is the talent show hula hooping queen?

She is lost...and it is killing me.

To think that this is over and to see such a "normal" kid for nearly 2 years has been just that, normal. To see her be a kid like she used to be has filled me with such happiness. Now square one has returned, and I am so angry I could spit.

Why is this a part of our life?

Why does a kid not get to be a kid when they only have a few years left to even be one?

So just pray for her.

She needs freedom from this before it robs us of who she really is.

I'm so sick of people saying it is nothing and let's just talk about it and she'll be fine while I watch my daughter wither before my eyes.

I will not lose her again to this monster.

So pray.
Thanks.

9 comments:

Brie said...

I'm so sorry Melissa! I am praying. Let me know if you need referrals for therapy. Remember that each developmental stage she will probably revisit her "issues" and deal with them at that level. As she knows truth she can refute the lies. A new thing I'm using with Mali and my clients is singing "he's got the the world in his hands" but replace world with "the fear". The craziness of this summer has probably instigated this a little she is trying to control her environment because she feels anxiety and holding on to those Fears feels like controlling her Environment. I'm Praying. Call me if you need too.

Beth said...

I am praying too and will also pray for her teacher.

Justin and Holley said...

Praying, praying, praying.

Jill said...

I am so incredibly sorry and she WILL be in my prayers constantly.

Meg said...

i wish i had words. i don't. claim truth. let Satan know he WILL NOT have your family. i promise to be praying!! so sorry.

Unknown said...

Praying praying praying. I feel your pain. Rejoice in hope, be patient in affliction, and constant in prayer.

Brett and Katherine said...

Oh Melissa, I'm so sorry to hear this. I will be praying for her!

ashley said...

Oh Melissa, I am so sorry. I don't have words that seem right but I will pray.

angie said...

I really hope she is SO much better! I am sorry to just now be reading this---tears honey because I can relate!!! Just know that I'm praying and here and quick to throw punches to all of those telling you 'it's nothing' !