Nada Pinata

Do you ever feel like that? Like nothing at all is worth saying or doing or talking about or spending time on? I've been having that feeling lately. (see last post)

Sure I have a lot going on. Most days I feel like I am barely making it, and still someone is never played with enough, never fed the right thing, and never has the clothes washed that they need. Can you see my three children in the above statement?? I've decided that ALL of us have A LOT going on. Too much if we're honest. Why do we keep going and going until we drop, until our children lose sleep and homework time, until we don't even know each other anymore besides a quick text late at night?

The whole not really having a job thing has definitely put a damper on some plans we made for gymnastics and music classes, but now I am secretly thankful. I completely believe in the value of them all, and cannot wait for my kids to be a part of some great experiences. I even get really upset sometimes that we are "missing the window" or "causing them to be behind their peers." I also get angry that we can't afford to do what we all want them to do. BUT this time of only Upward basketball(which is enough, thank you very much, with 2 kids having games at the same time and back to back all over Lubbock) has been nice. Most nights we are home. We do normal snack, homework, play, dinner, bath, and bed. Tyson is gone for a lot of that due to selling cars...did I mention he was doing that?...and teaching night classes at Wayland. For the most part we just are here in the evenings, and I really am so thankful!

Maybe this is why I've got nothing to post right now.

Yes, I could do every post on my emotional struggles losing Brie, my insecurities about our future, my worries about different health things with my kid, or what I am having for dinner. But right now I've just got nada. (You might be praying for nothing when I again pour my heart out all over the page in a sloppy mess, which I know I will happen, so be ready.)

And for your information, we were having veggie lasagna, but after seeing how long I needed to chop things, I have decided on something way more exciting. Leftovers.