Hanging With the Champ

After a long day of driving to Amarillo, crying, getting Eleri ready for her 2 year pictures, organizing closets, taking lunch to Mali's school, organizing closets, crying, putting Eleri to sleep in Brie's bed, crying...maybe sobbing this time, organizing closets, hanging up endless amounts of clothes, playing Barbies, eating dinner, and organizing more clothes, it was time to make a visit to the hospital. Eric taught me how to scrub in, and I really have no idea how he has any skin left after 3 times a day of that! Typing up Curran's caringbridge journal every day is an honor, and I gladly do it, but I just needed to see him. I needed to see him breathing, moving, opening his eyes, eating, LIVING. When I saw him at 2 days old it was hard. Here was this miracle, this beautiful piece of my friend, but he was struggling. Your mind, just for a second, goes to a place you never want to go. I just gazed at all of him...his chest retracting inches down, his tiny fingers moving on his hands, his swollen eyes squinted closed...and I begged God for his life. For his perfect life. For a world-changing life. For a LONG life. Begged Him through my tears. Tomorrow...well, today if I don't hurry up...will be one month since Brie left and Curran arrived. He has made huge strides in that NICU. He has already changed tens of thousands of lives. He has changed mine. So seeing him there, filled out and squirming all over the place, was a gift! I have a passion for Brie's kids. I've always loved them so much, but now I want them to know and remember how much their mom loved and cherished them. Another one of Brie's friends,Carrie, also came Amarillo for a few days of loving on the girls and helping out, and she got to hold Curran skin-on-skin. She was Brie's best friend, and when she sent me the text telling me what she was able to do my heart nearly burst. She prayed over him and sang to him and spoke scriptures into his ears. Carrie is a woman of God. Carrie loved Brie so very much. Carrie was able to love on Curran when Brie couldn't, speaking God's truth to him like Brie would have. I'm so very proud of Carrie McCullough!! I feel like this is what we will be doing whenever God gives us chances to do so...just loving on them however we can. I was so excited to see Curran and to actually touch him and get to know him more. He just is so amazing! He was moving all around, he was hungry and rooting on his hand, he pulled out the nasal cannula many times, he ripped off his feeding tube tape, he sneezed again and again, he sucked on his pacifier while he got his feeding, he gazed at me, he moved his head when Eric would talk...amazing! I know all of these things seem so small to most of you, but for Curran these things are huge. He is growing and developing and doing what babies need to be doing. He still has a long road ahead. We do not think every day left in NICU will be a mountaintop. But he is thriving. He is living! I think I could have stayed all night long. I rubbed his soft reddish hair and talked to him and patted him and just loved on him for as long as I could. I'm so in love with this sweet boy. The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy. Curran the Champion...God will be honored and lifted up by his life. You have done great things, God.